How To Ignore The Wrong People And Live In Peace

There are people and then there are wrong people. How to distinguish between them? I’ll tell you how!

Red Flag 1: They always de-motivate you.

Red Flag 2: They always make fun of you and not in a friendly way.

Red Flag 3: They always generalize your passions with the rest of the world.

Red Flag 4: You are never good enough for them.

Red Flag 5: They threaten you.

Red Flag 6: They are rude and have a huge ego inside their belly.

Which reminds me – why do we end up having these people in our lives? Circumstances maybe. Takes a while to identify all of these traits. Maybe, this does not make them ‘wrong’ but it definitely affects your mental health. It’s best to ignore such souls or just stay away from their thought process.

Follow your heart and all works out 🙂

When An Introvert Has To Survive A Networking Event

Are we in for a world war tragedy zone specially designed for attacking introverts? Yes, we are. Uh, yes! We are!

I’m not going to use some random name like ‘Susie’ to describe the following scenarios. However, these might help you. I used the word ‘might’ for a reason. This one is dedicated to all the introverts out there.

  1. Smile – You remember that awkward smile we talk about like all the time? Use it. As soon as you walk into that weird looking hall/room/pigeonhole that they have this in, spread out your jaws and go glee. Two things can happen here: you’ll either creep out anyone from approaching you or you’ll attract some interesting folks who prefer ‘small talk‘. And we know how much we despise that.
  2. Pretend – This one usually works because we’ve mastered the art of caring when we really do not. Being forcibly pushed into a gang of 8 where souls are cracking silly corporate jokes? Laugh. Some people are stupid. They’d buy it.
  3. Assume The Room Is Empty – Usually works when you’ve a big presentation to deliver. Imagine a room with nobody in it and you’re the master of speeches. Go ahead and deliver your pitch. By pitch, I mean do not do these rookie mistakes. Well, the only downside is, you sort of have to ask if the audience, that you were assuming is invisible, has any questions. I’ve a tip for this one as well.

That’s a great question. Let me do some research and I’ll get back to you later.

Works like a charm.

4. Ask Open Ended Questions About Them – That way, they get to do the talking and you don’t have to worry about coming up with another question to keep them occupied. Avoid specific questions like – where are you from?  Gets over too soon before you know it. Besides, doesn’t really matter where they’re from because that’ll whirl back to small talk which we are trying to avoid.

5. Be Confident – This one scares as well as impresses people. Now, you don’t always want to scare them, do you? Let’s focus on impressing because first impressions count and all that jazz. Ask a relevant question or throw in a line or two on the topic for which the event has been organized. To appear confident, you need to do your homework. Fire up the topic quickly on your phone just to see if you can use some phrases.

6. Be Alive – Our greatest struggle being an introvert is to seem non-existent even though we are physically present. I won’t promise any tips/tricks for this. It usually requires years of not-giving-a-damn and using a combination of all the above pointers.

So, the next time, you’re at a networking event, remember that you’re superman or wonderwoman and use your invisible cape to fly.

When You Want To Start Afresh In Life And Live Again

Are you afraid that this is just another How-To article? Relax, it’s not. Life is funny and we just need to have a good sense of humor to understand it.

There was a point in my life. Ah! Who am I kidding? I am still at this point in my life where everything seems to be going wrong.

Work is not fun anymore.

People are not interesting.

Dogs are not cute. Wait, dogs are always cute but not cute enough to be taken care of. P.S: I love dogs!

There is no desire to travel.

Hobbies keep changing.

Food is not edible. Junk food is not delicious. (I know right?!)

No amount of sleep is enough.

Basically, what the hell happened to all the life around us?

This cannot go on. I decided to write about it because writing always helps. Trust me on this. It is probably the most underrated therapy anyone can suggest but it works like a charm.

  1. Finding The Purpose Of Life – Such a fancy stuff. I have had several discussions about this with family, friends, people at work and even cabbies (because they have all the wisdom). However, the conclusion was that this is a waste of time. Forget the purpose of life. I rather find nothing and just try to create something. Create your own purpose in life. Create your own presence in life. Create life in general. Create, create and then create some more.
  2. Remember To Breathe – I tried this. Our minds are like a yapping monkey and it tends to get so chaotic that we forget to live in the present. Constant thoughts about past, future, assumptions, people, scenarios – it is a little too much. Whenever we do this though, our breathing tends to be faster. Try to notice the change as soon as you focus all your attention on your breathing. Try sitting down for 5 minutes, close your eyes and BREATHE! During this exercise, check if you had thoughts about breathing or something else. Do it now. Sit & Breathe.
  3. Talking To Everyone – Not good. De-clutter your friend-list or conversational buddies. You do not have to respond to everybody. You do not have to listen to everybody. Worst of all, you do not have to follow what everyone asks you to do. In all this talking drama with everyone in the world, you forget that it is your life and not theirs. I was an idiot to experiment my life based on opinions of others and it did not go well. However, I am glad it didn’t because now I know what not to do.
  4. Finish What You Started – I am particularly horrible at this. The magic happens after you quit midway. We just don’t know it yet. Let’s start with mini goals. Make yourself a cup of coffee or tea. Write a 5 worded description of your day. Organize that desk you’ve always wanted to see. When was the last time you noticed the color of your desk? Anyway, I forgot mine.
  5. Disconnect/Connect – Disconnecting from the entire world maybe a bad idea. Stay connected to the relevant channels or people you feel add value to your life.
  6. Do What You Love – Even if it is for a day, take the entire day off and just do what you love. No, it is not a waste of time. You never know what you discover in that one day.

I am keeping it short because starting over should be relaxing and not taxing. Liked reading my space? Subscribe to my blog




When The Corkscrew Was Never Found

This is how we welcomed the new year – 2018.

I mean my father would have preferred the corkscrew for inaugurating the very questionable brand of wine that he picked up from the supermarket. The kitchen was clean because we decided to do the intimate family evening for new years eve.


Wine – check (we’ll come back to you in a while)

Horrible junk dinner – check

Good movie – check

Mom: So should we order dinner?

Me: Err, we still have to get us some wine.

Dad: I’m on it!

Me: I’ll get the glasses

Mom: I’ll see if that serial is on.

Me & Dad: NO! We are not watching some guy falling off a girl’s bike on new years eve.

Mom: Serve the wine already.

*hearing Dad panic a bit*

Me: What’s going on?

Dad: I didn’t notice. This bottle has a cork.

Me: Oh, that’s okay. I’ll get the corkscrew.

Dad: It should be here somewhere.

*after 30 minutes of aggressive searching*

Me: Where the hell is the corkscrew?! Do you think it’s in the closet?

Dad: Sure. We looked under the kitchen cabinets, in the medical boxes, washrooms, bedroom, under the couch, in the balcony but I am pretty sure I stuffed the cork screw under our clothes.

Me: *sniffs* You know you can be nice when you say that

Dad: Would you stop being dramatic and find the damn screw? I am not spending new years without opening this baby.

Mom: Could’ve finished watching a serial

Me: Mom please. Not now. Can’t we just use a knife?

*suddenly mom jumps off the couch*

Mom: Um, What did you say?!

Me: Mom, relax. It’s not like I said I want to murder someone.  Just trying to think of alternatives

Dad: You both are useless. Let me use chopsticks to shove it into the cork

Me: Sure! Why didn’t I think of that?

Dad: You got a better idea?

Me: Yeah alright.

*Mom holds the bottle, I hold mom’s hands, dad stares at us*

Dad: I am so lucky to have you guys in my life. *absolute sarcasm tone*

Me & Mom: Oh you’re welcome

*manages to jibe into the cork, some bits and pieces being pulled out*

Mom: What is that?

Dad: It’s the cork material

Mom: What if it goes into the wine?

Dad: We drink it anyway. We are drinking the wine even if it has bird poop in it

Mom: Okay, this does not look good.

Me: Can we do this with a knife?

*we cut through half way into the cork and exhaust ourselves*

Dad: If I haven’t said so already, great start to the evening

Mom: Just dip the cork into the bottle

Dad: Wow, look who beamed up

Mom: I am tired of you two. *walks away*

Me: You know she’s right. Right?

Dad: Of course, she’s right. She’s always right! Story of my marriage! Now push that cork in already.


*red wine all over our hands*

Dad: Oh good. How efficient!

Me: Hey! I tried!

*wine being poured in the glasses using a strainer because sometimes cork pieces get in the way*

Mom: So, shall we order dinner now?

Me & Dad: 😐

The food arrived. There was barely any flavor but the movie was great. Of course, with dad commenting every 5 minutes did NOT help.

Oh! Before I end this, wishing you all a very HAPPY 2018!  

Note: I have an adorably crazy family and I love them. 

Introverse – The universe of an introvert

Yes, I could have used this as a title for my blog but turns out there already are wiki-meaning pages on that. I ruled out a title because it’s a dictionary word. Okay, I am weird!

Which brings me to the point of this post – being weird. Apparently, being weird and being an introvert is connected. In today’s world, it does not matter if you throw a puppy off the roof but god save you if you are an introvert. BTW, please do not throw a puppy or anyone or anything off the roof. It’s just.. it’s SAD! Don’t do it. I love dogs more than humans. But you see, someone’s personality is just as personal as being attached to a puppy. Why are introverts looked down upon?

Google the term ‘introverts’ and there are thousands of articles trying to forcibly convert them into extroverts. I mean why? So, the girl wants to avoid a party and stay at home and order some takeaway. Is that so bad?

Some things that introverts are NOT:

Anti social – We just like to hang out with people we connect with. Makes sense?

Anti fun – We like fun. Our kind of fun is different. Looking at the stars or the sky, maybe. Playing cuddle with a pet. Entertaining a baby just to see them laugh as much. Listening to music while asleep.

Bad friends – We are the greatest friends you can have. Trust me. In fact, if we befriend you, consider yourself lucky. Okay, I’ll stop bragging but we are the right people to be friends with. And it comes with a perk – we are good listeners

Weird – Okay, now seriously, who is not weird? Aren’t you? If you’re not then that’s cool too. Nah, I’m kidding. Not being weird is weird. However, being weird is fun. People dig that. Animals dig that even more. Babies? Well, they laugh at you.

Lone Bird – Apparently, the rest of the world is always surrounded by people. You want to know a secret? We crave for space and we enjoy this trait. Feel miserable for us? Go ahead. But you know you want it too

Boring – Because we missed out on that drinking shot and flash mob practice last weekend? Hope you had fun because we were busy having fun having conversations about whatever happened to Pluto. That bores you? Aww.

I am done writing about our labels. 29 years of my life and counting and being an introvert is the best part about myself. So all the extrovert, ambivert, pretencious introvert or paid authors out there, just lay off us, pretty please? We love you all.

As for my introvert friends, I’ve got your back 🙂

When I Went To Buy An iPhone

And did groceries instead. 

It’s a true story. I am caught up in the web of internet where I see beautiful, pretty pictures being clicked on social media and say to myself: I WANT THAT! One of those mornings when you wake up and have those impulse buying decisions and realize that you do not have the money to make your impulses come true. At this moment, there is no more than bread money in my card and I still thought why not go and get myself an iPhone? That’ll end my miseries. Oh boy, was I wrong!

So I get dressed and go to the store anyway

Store Lady: Excuse me ma’am, Can I help you with something?

Me: *busy looking around*

Store Lady: Ma’am?

Me: *turning around* Umm, yes I wanted to buy an iPhone.

Store Lady: Oh sure! Please have a seat.

I had no idea we needed to sit for this. Felt more like they were going to parade me with their collection of diamonds but I sat anyway.

Store Lady: You want the 7 or…*gets interrupted*

Me: Just show me the cheapest one you have.

Store Lady: We have some refurbished phones

Me: Sorry, what’s that now?

Store Lady: These are phones used by people for a small duration and then returned to the factory.

Me: Factory? Why? Did they use their iPhones to play break against the wall?

*she stares at me*

Me: Nevermind! So, I think I’ll go for a brand new one. Maybe the 6 for now. 32 gb should do. Something in silver?

Store Lady: Absolutely! How would you like to pay?

Me: *beaming proudly* I’ve got Mastercard.

Store Lady: Sorry, we don’t accept credit cards.

Me: What? Say that again?

Store Lady: Only local credit cards maybe. Not international credit cards. We accept local payments..

Me: *can feel my heart crashing* Yes yes, I hear you loud and clear.

Store Lady: Would you like to pay by cash?

*do I look like I have that much cash on me? I just put on my pyjamas and a tee on a weekend morning*

Me: Yeah, I think I’ll try to purchase one online. Thanks for your time.

And I ran out of there almost trying to compete with Bolt. I went to my happy place. The supermarket. Sometimes groceries can do wonders!

Mom’s handbag

Allow me to introduce you to my mother’s handbag. Well, it has everything except the thing that she or anyone else might be looking for. Oh, I know before I go on, you all will point it out to me saying, “Wait, a minute! We can’t find stuff in our own bags most of the times as well.”, but before you get there I wanted to mention a couple of stuff. One can literally find the most ridiculous objects in it.
Err, mom I promise I’ll keep your handbag’s privacy and I’m only going to talk about the items which are no less than irrelevant. A few hours ago, I had to search for Boroline. Yep, I know we Bengalis love it. As I went on looking for it in the drawers, table, top of the fridge shelf, bathroom closet and every possible place, I was unable to find it so I turned to the ultimate search guide: MOM! She asked me to look inside her bag and that’s when I knew that my search is about to get real wild. This almost convinced me to stop looking for the creme but she coaxed me to stop being such a lazy dull dud and forced me to search anyway. Aaaand here it goes!
Well, this is the weird part and it happens everytime. Whenever we go out and we’re looking for money or change or even the phone (I’ll come to this part later), she always ALWAYS ends up looking in the wrong section. I don’t know if the bag is onto her or it does that just to irritate her. Anyway, coming back to the point, I started searching – Now, this bag has four sections (the first zip, the middle zip, the last zip and the small zip at the back)
The first zip
As usual, like mom, I too start with the wrong section everytime. I keep digging and I find stuff like
empty medicine strips
torn pieces of paper with NOTHING written on it
hankies (2-3 of them)
keys (alright, this is relevant)
plastic bags (maybe relevant?)
small thin religious books (now that explains the uncontrolled heaviness)
Moving on to the second zip
Lots of empty bottles of homeopathy meds. Empty? Damn! I could’ve popped some pills.
Third zip and by now I almost lost it and gave a shoutout to my mom as well saying: There’s nothing in here!. She screams back: Keep looking! It’s gotta be there in a corner.
This section was surprisingly empty
Finally, the smallest zip at the back and this is where she chooses to keep the phone! And this is the part I wanted to talk about. If she EVER receives a call, there’s no way she’s going to be able to successfully find her phone till the last ring. She also missed the entire call and found the phone after the call converts into a missed call. But anyway, there was success here! I found my BOROLINE lying at a corner stuffed like a small teddy. Ooh, I found an adorable keychain in there as well..Wait, why am I talking about a keychain?
So, I found the stuff after searching the entire bag. Yes, you’d think that had I started the search with the smallest zip, this wouldn’t have been such a herculian task. Now, if you think about it, this kind of highlights Murphy’s law a bit.
On a very very serious note to all my invisible lovely readers out there: I’m so sorry. I’ve been off the radar blog for a while now.

Roomie Revenge

The previous two posts did speak a lot on the lines of marriage. Let’s take a bit of detour from those, shall we? Before you start hovering more around the title, I’ll break the ice for you. I’ve been traveling a lot in the last few months. I know! I know! That’s SO unlike me. No, not traveling like once to the Alps and then the next day to the Kandahars. I meant – traveling to home and then my second home back and forth. Hence, the concept of packing has been a little too — well, let’s just say I’ve a PhD in it by now. I’m sick of it. Tired of packing and unpacking. Even reached a point where I literally did not unpack certain stuff and just took it straight out from the bag after hours of searching my closets. Closet is a very fancy term for someone who stays in a PG but that’s not the point! Coming back to packing – this time it’s sort of a major step forward. Yep, I’m leaving Chennai. I’m moving back to the land where I was born. Initially, I was excited about it but then once I started thinking of all the stuff that I’ve to give up, I was disheartened (and this is a bit of an understatement!). My roomie and I were talking on what I’ve to give up and we came up with a bunch of stuff.
Roomie: When are you gonna start packing?
Me: I’ve sort of already started if you didn’t notice.
Roomie: Uh huh. Where exactly have you started?
Me: Remember, how I threw away the eggs the other day..
Roomie: Wow, score! Throwing away the eggs – that’s packing alright.
Me: No no, seriously. I’m freaking out. I’ve so much stuff and I’m only allowed like 20 Kgs of stuff that I can drag around.
*after a few minutes of silence*
Roomie: Relax! You’ll be fine. Let’s figure out what you can’t take with you.
*she starts listing down*
Roomie: Bucket, mugs, laundry bag, plastic trays, cereal boxes…
Me: Whoa whoa, boxes? I’ve a lot of them. Would you like to take away the salt/sugar I’ve stored in ’em?
Roomie: Sure.
Me: I’ve got Surf Excel as well.
Roomie: Sure.
Me: You can keep the sandwich maker, btw.
Roomie: Sure.
Me: I’ve got some clothes as well.
Roomie: Nah, I’m good.
Me: I’ve got some moisturisers and shampoo bottles.
Roomie: Plural? I’ll take them.
Me: You can use my tray, btw.
Roomie: Sure.
Me: My bed as well.
Roomie: I know.
Me: Yeah, you use that anyway when I’m not around.
Roomie: *grins*
*after an hour of waking me up from almost sleeping*
Roomie: Hey! You won’t be able to drink or hangout with your friends anymore.
Me: Thanks for bringing that up. Let’s just focus on goods in Chennai, shall we?
Roomie: You won’t be able to talk to your friends on the phone at night either?
Me: Uh huh.
Roomie: You won’t have time to watch movies on your laptop.
Me: Uh huh.
Roomie: You won’t be able to hang up on your mom when she talks about marriage.
Me: Uh huh.
Roomie: You won’t be able to order outside food much even when you’re craving for it.
Me: Uh huh.
Roomie: You won’t be able to reach home early just by walking from work.
Me: Did I do something to you? Go back to sleep!
The more I thought about it, she was actually right. I was so busy in planning on what I’m looking forward to that I almost forgot about what I’m gonna be giving up – My freedom! And it did suck but then silver lining to the rescue.
*waking her up*
Me: I will be able to cook my own food.
Roomie: Uh huh.
Me: I will be able to have fish every single day.
Roomie: Uh huh.
Me: I will be able to stuff my clothes into the washing machine and not worry about handwashing!
Roomie: Uh huh.
Me: I will be able to watch TV!
Roomie: Uh huh.
Me: I can get broadband connection and download movies in seconds.
Roomie: Uh huh.
Me: I will be saving on rent. 😀
Roomie: *glares at me*
Me: I will be saving in general as well. 😀
Roomie: Alright. I’m real sleepy.
Me: No more power cuts!
Roomie: Get your tush back to your bed!
More in my next post which will be written soon. *tongues out*

g(ROOM) under construction

We are back with the second part of Hitchy Business. Today, I’m gonna discuss on the process of groom hunting. I started thinking on how painful the entire process of arranged marriage has been painted in the Indian society. Just think of the time when you go to the market in the scorching heat to buy some vegetables. Let’s take tomatoes, shall we? Now, you’ll obviously not pick up any random tomatoes into your basket. What do you check? If they’re firm or soft or hard err let’s just say – you check on the texture. Anyway,  enough of Tomato Talk! Instead of tomatoes, picture well groomed guys and instead of the heat there’s the pressure. No no, I’m not checking out the texture of those guys here. K But you’d certainly wish I was because the criterions that me + my parents + my friends + my environment have put into filtering out the right guys are much more difficult than just plain texture checking. 🙁
Even if I did rule out criterion, I’d still say finding THE ONE surely is taking it out of me. Honestly, it’s the only time I actually realized the importance of Love marriage. C’mon, finding a person who’s as freaky as you and getting hitched to ‘em? That’s truly a dream come true. And it rules out the interference of your family members into choosing your soul mate (if this exists!). I guess I wasn’t bright enough to see this coming my way.
I struck up with a very worry-some conversation with my roommate (we’ll give her a pseudo name Pinki) who’s also  sailing in a similar boat as I am. The stink of it is the more we discuss about this, the more we realize that we’re entering into the snake pit.
Pinki: I used to worry about spending the rest of the life with a stranger. I never thought finding that stranger would take a lifetime.
Me: That’s painfully funny. So, didja like anybody?
Pinki: Sure. Well, there’s the guy who loves his dogs more than his family. Then, there’s the other guy who shaved off his head. Ofcourse, there’s the third guy who painted his profile with all his certifications.
Me: That bad eh?
Pinki: Well, it gets worse. People should really photograph well. What’s with the glares everywhere? Do they hate making eye contact with the camera?
Me: I’m sort of judging them a bit on their profile description as well.
Pinki: Well, how much can you judge a person by words..
Me: No no, trust me you can.
I came across this profile –
Pinki: Sure. The caps is too loud.
Me: Out of all the things, you came up with loud caps as the only problem with that description?!
Pinki: Life is sad, eh. But your parents are surely making it worse for you, girl.
She’s right though. My parents are surely taking an extra mile with this thing. It’s bad enough that I cannot find a decent guy and to garnish it with their silly wants is just making it better. I happened to like some guys and I’m about to discuss them with my mother and this is what happens..
Me: Mom! I think I found a nice guy. He’s working in a similar domain as I am. And he’s smart, good looking..
Mom: Is he a manglik?
Me: Sorry?
Mom: What’s his nakshatra?
Me: You’re talking to me right?
Mom: Did he score with you?
Me: Well, I haven’t really taken my relationship with him to that level, if you know what I mean..
Mom: I meant horoscope scores!
Me: Oh, that..
Mom: Also, check if he has siblings
Me: *silence*
Mom: Also, check if he is really as old as he claims to be.
Me: Well, he has hair on his head, if that counts for something.
Mom: Also, check..
Me: Mom, I’m sure he’ll check himself out with all the checking that you’re asking me to do.
*I hang up*
And that’s how my morning starts every day. I find a guy and my parents reject him. If they find a guy, I reject him. If we mutually like a guy, the Sun, Moon, Earth, Venus and probably even Pluto is waiting to reject him. Imagine losing a good guy because he has a friggin’ Pluto in his 8th house.
If the above sounded all Greek to you, I’m talking about horoscopes which probably belongs to astrology. It’s this board game format with planets scattered across it.
I was talking to a friend the other day regarding this and I shocked him to his very core. I don’t blame him. Poor guy didn’t talk to me for a week!
Friend: Anaa! What’s new with you? You seeing someone?
Me: I’m seeing many, if that makes sense.
Friend: Wow, that happening eh?
Me: Yep, totally! In the afternoons, I talk to them. At nights, I score with them. In the mornings, I turn them down or vice versa.
Friend: Err, them?
Me: I can’t recall how many though..
Friend: Are you high? What are you talking about?
Me: I’m talking about guys.
Friend: Uh huh, sure you are. So you are with these guys like in a group?
Me: Oh no no, I try them one by one.
Friend: Wokay, I have to go. Let’s talk later, shall we?

Well, that came out wrong. Can you blame me though? I’ll be sharing my encounters with a gay guy, with a normal one, with a weirdo and also men from different communities/castes/races in the next post. Adios for now! I’ve got some selection and rejection to face.